Back to School Transition Tips – Scheduling
August 7, 2008
I remember when I was a little girl; I couldn’t wait for the end of the school year. Summer was a much anticipated season and there were so many things that we could do. I loved being able to sleep in late and have the freedom of not having a schedule. Even though I really loved summer vacation I was one of those kids who actually enjoyed school but when the end of summer started coming to a close I was still sad to see the end of the fun and have to go back to the everyday routine of the school year. My kids are not at all like me; they do not like school and dread the ending of summer time and the starting of a new school year.
When we homeschooled we didn’t have a summer break since we did a bit of schooling all year round but since the kids have been in public school for the past four years I have found a few ideas that work for us to start getting ready to ease back into the school year routine. Since it won’t be long till school starts I thought I’d share a few of my favorite ideas with you over the next few days.
One of the most important things that I do with my kids is to start getting them back “on schedule” before school starts. For us this means that we go back to 8:00 bedtimes and 7:00 wake up time. My kids hate this but I have to admit that I despise this new schedule even more than they do! In the summer time I am accustomed to going bed around 1 or 2 in the morning (sometimes even later) and getting up around 8, 9, or even 10. LOL I am not a morning person and I really enjoy my late night work sessions. For me I have to start adjusting my schedule about 3 weeks before they go back to school so that I can get into the habit of going to bed at 10:30/11:00 and getting up at 6:30/7:00. The kids adapt a bit easier and since I don’t need to make as drastic of a change to their schedule two weeks is enough for them.
Along with adjusting their bedtime schedule I start getting them back into their school year routines which includes setting out their clothes the night before, doing their chores in the evening after supper, earlier story times, and less television. I also make them get dressed right away in the morning before breakfast just like we would during the school year rather than allowing them to lounge around in their jammies. Another adjustment I make is having them start wearing shoes a majority of the day. My kids are barefoot nearly all summer long and they hate it when they have to wear shoes to school all day.
By getting the kids back into a school routine a couple of weeks early I have found that they are more prepared for the start of school, they’re less cranky, I’m less cranky, and things seem to flow pretty easily during the transition from summer time to school time.
I’ll see ya in a couple of days with another idea to get our kids ready for school. If you want to make sure you don’t miss out when the next tip is posted just sign up below and you’ll start receiving my posts in your e-mail box.
Everyone’s Doing It
July 30, 2008
Mawwwwwwwm, my friend has a Nintendo DS and I really want one; you can play all these really cool games, go in chat rooms, blah, blah, blah. She lost me at “go in chat rooms”. Yes, I did some research and maybe some would argue that it’s not as bad as it sounds but I just don’t want that kind of technology in my child’s hands. “All my friends have one”. And my response is; “good for them; all the children that live in this house will not have one.” How do you handle the situation when your child tells you that all their friends are doing something or have something or go somewhere or wear something and you don’t approve of it? I have witnessed children in my daughter’s fourth grade class with cell phones! Here are a few ideas that have helped me get through this onslaught from all my kids.
First of all I had to cone to terms with the fact that yes there are indeed 2 kids in her class that do have and carry cell phones but that not “all” the kids carry a cell phone. This helped me realize that I am not alone on my stand on this matter as well as various other matters that I don’t approve of for my kids. Sometimes as a parent you will need to make some hard choices that your child is not going to like but you can be rest assured that you are not the only parent who is making hard choices and decisions; other parents just like you are doing the same thing for their child.
One of the most important things that I work to maintain is a bond of love between my children and I. My kids know that no matter what they do or say that I will always love them; my love for them is not something that will ever be a doubt in their minds. Since this is so deeply ingrained in them it makes it a bit easier for me to discuss many difficult issues with them. I have had many discussions with all of my kids about the rules we have in this house versus the rules that their friends have in their houses. I have made sure they understand I am not responsible for setting limitations for their friends and I can only do what I feel is right and best for my own children and it is the responsibility of every parent to do what they feel is right and best for their own kids. I have also made sure they understand that just because someone else’s rules are different from ours it doesn’t make either one of us right and the other wrong; we’re just different people with different standards.
I’ve also found it to be very important to know I establish my boundaries on a various number of issues so when something comes up I don’t have to flounder for an answer with my kids. I have a very strong and firm stance on things such as sneaking out of the house, lying, drugs, alcohol, sex, dating, and other dangerous issues for my kids. On the other hand if my child wants to cut his/her hair into the latest fad or dye it orange it’s not something I argue too much about. I’m not going to pay for something I don’t particularly like but if they want to foot the bill for something outrageous I have no problem letting them do it. I feel it’s important to pick my battles and only fight for something major. Orange hair will eventually go away but a pregnant teenager is something that has to be dealt with for the rest of their lives.
In our house we also have a family contract; this contract states the rules, the consequences for breaking the rules and the rewards for obeying the rules. Everyone, including mom, signs the contract and everyone is expected to abide by the terms of the contract. This gives the family a clear cut set of rules to abide by without any excuses saying someone didn’t know it was a rule.
Kids are kids and not grown-ups; they are going to make mistakes and do some stupid stuff over the course of their childhood and adolescent years. Don’t forget to think back to your own childhood and the stuff you did; also remember there were times when your parents cut you some slack. I can clearly remember the first time I ever went out on a date at the age of 15; I didn’t come home till after 3:00 in the morning. My parents did not specifically tell me when to come home so I went home when I was good and ready to go home! You know what? They didn’t ground me until I was 21, they didn’t scream and yell, they didn’t lock me in my bedroom; instead they sat down and told me from now on whenever I wanted to go out on a date that 10 (or maybe 11 – I’m not sure now) was my curfew and they expected me to be home by that time without any excuse or there would be consequences. Now I can guarantee you I didn’t always make it home on time and there were definitely consequences but the point is my parents balanced things out and cut me some slack where it was needed and implemented consequences where it was needed. Be sure to do the same thing with your kids as well.
Always keep the lines of communication open between you and your child; as they grow up to be teens they will need to know they can always come to you for any problem, question, or just to talk. It’s best to have your teenage daughter come to you to tell you her boyfriend is pressuring her to have sex rather than to find out she is suddenly gaining weight and her doctor tells you she’s pregnant. Give your child a chance to prove you can trust them and give an extra special pat on the back when they prove you can and also be sure to be there to lend them a hand back up when they fail. Growing up is a learning process of many trials and errors; just remember you wouldn’t be where you are today without making many of the same mistakes your kids are bound to make. Make sure they know you will never turn your back on them.
Being a parent is never easy; you and I both know it! I can’t believe that I already have a child who has according to most people’s standards become an adult. Over the years there have been a lot of things we didn’t agree on but in the end he knows I love him and I will always be here for him. He has pushed me to my ultimate limits many times but I have kept my resolve on the important issues when it came to the “all my friends….” statements. I have to believe in his heart he feels safe, and loved because I have set boundaries for him that will keep him safe.
***NOTE: I do realize that the chat room feature of the Nintendo DS can be turned off – the actual point of this blog was not about the pros and cons of this toy but rather what I have done when my children come to me with the “but everyone else does…” type of statement.
Over the Hills and Through the Woods…
July 26, 2008
Every summer when I was little my dad, my brother, and I would pack our suitcases, all dad’s fishing gear and we’d head to grandma and grandpa’s house. Our visits would last anywhere from a couple of weeks up to the entire summer. Dad worked for a large company and would always get two weeks vacation and often “change-over” would come during summer time so we would spend plenty of time “up north”. (We lived in Illinois; grandma and grandpa lived in Adams, WI)
On a couple occasions my brother and I would get to spend some time with them without dad being with us and we always had a great time. I can remember my grandma reading to us from a story book every night. Over the years I can imagine that she probably re-read some of those stories many, many time. Then just before she shut out the lights she would have us say our evening prayers:
“Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray the Lord my soul to keep and if I die before I wake I pray the Lord my soul to take.” God bless daddy and mommy and grandma and grandpa, and… (Depending on how long we wanted to prolong the lights out process we could come up with a whole list of people, birds, animals, plants, trees, and whatever else that needed “blessing”! LOL)
When I was a little girl my grandparents were in their mid-60’s, both of them were retired, and came from a different era than many of today’s grandparents. They had very little income but we never seemed to run out of a supply of fun things to do with them. Grandpa had his squirrels that we could help him feed and grandma had birds (outside birds that is) to feed and water. Don’t forget the garden that had to be tended and berries to pick somewhere I don’t even remember now. If we happened to be there at the right time we could also go mushroom picking with them. Of course there were always cousins to visit, church on Sunday and grandma’s Royal Neighbors meetings and socials to be attended. In the evening there was always a good game of dominoes to be played while listening to either a Brewer’s game or the country music countdown. Watching television wasn’t an option for us except for Saturday morning cartoons. Every now and then grandma would let us watch The Price is Right and then she had a soap opera in the afternoon that she turned on; she never really watched it, though, ‘cause she’d always fall asleep.
It seems that traveling to visit grandma and grandpa in a different city or state was more common when I was a kid than it is now. Kids usually love spending time with their grandparents and summer time is often the only time they get a chance to do it.
If you have parents that are able to take the grandkids for a few days or maybe even a week or more it would be a wonderful experience for your kids. You should take some time and plan ahead to make it easier for both the kids and your parents. You need to consider things like activities they like to do, having spending money so grandma and grandpa don’t have to foot the bill, and what to do if they want to come home early.
You can make a list ahead of time for your parents about things the kids like to do and often many grandparents enjoy swimming, fishing, visiting the local zoo, taking a trip to a big mall, or perhaps even to an amusement park. If you have a list ahead of time it’ll give the grandparents a few ideas but you should also remind the kids that they can’t expect to be allowed to do everything they want and they shouldn’t complain.
Staying with grandma and grandpa can be a fun adventure for kids; if you do some advance planning it should turn out to be a good experience for everyone.
Television Alternatives
July 24, 2008
The further we get into July the hotter it seems to get outside. My kids are not interested in playing out in the heat any longer and I don’t like the idea of them vegging out in front of the tv all day either. In fact I have removed the cable package and we now just get the local channels; that doesn’t stop the kids from trying to pop in a movie to keep them from being bored in this heat. Of course I can understand how they feel and don’t want to make them go outside either. I’ve let my kids know that movie time is limited and that the can start spending more time reading.
As you know from some previous posts our library has a summer reading program that they have been participating in; the program has actually now ended but I’ve started an incentive program of my own with them. They each have a set minimum amount of time which they are required to read each day after 15 days everyone who has met their minimum gets their choice of treat at the ice cream stand.
As temperatures soar during the summer, many people prefer to remain indoors in the cool air conditioning. Unfortunately, that means children and teens will be spending more time in front of a screen and less time using their minds. Encourage your children to plan for summertime reading to keep their minds sharp.
We continue to make a weekly trip to our library every Monday and since my daughter reads faster than everyone else she has the privilege of walking to the library on her own on Thursday to pick out more books. Buddy has difficulty reading and even though he is entering 7th grade in the fall he only reads at a 2nd grade reading level. One of things I did before I started taking the kids to the library this summer was to find out what sort of books he likes to read; once we went to the library I started looking up books with topics about the things he likes to read and made sure they were at his reading level. I also allow him to check out books that are below his reading level as a sort of incentive to read the books that he able to read.
Another incentive that my kids enjoy is that they are allowed to pick out 1 comic book to read each week. This is a good way to motivate a reluctant reader because the text is large, the sentences are short, and the full story isn’t very long. Since the pictures help tell the story they feel they are better able to read and understand the story.
Another thing we do is have a set time for reading every night. First of all we all sit and read to ourselves for a little bit and then I have one book that I read aloud to everyone. Lastly I have another book at everyone’s reading level that I have them read a couple pages from each night as well. They truly enjoy this reading time together and it really promotes my goal of family togetherness as well.
First Aid Tips for Single Moms
July 22, 2008
For a single mom — well any parent for that matter — having a properly stocked first aid kit is extremely important. I’ve found that having a few essentials on hand can make a difference when you’re faced with an emergency situation and can help you to stay calmer than if you had to run around searching for stuff.
Phone numbers – these should be programmed on your phone, posted on the fridge, or put in some convenient place that you can remember and readily access
ice packs – I have a couple that I picked up that work great as hot or cold packs. I keep them in the freezer all the time; if I need to warm them up it’s quick and easy to pop in the microwave.
thermometer
Vaseline – to use with rectal thermometer
pain reliever – ibuprofen or acetaminophen
measuring syringe – you might prefer to use a spoon or dropper whichever will work best for your child
elastic and adhesive bandages
tape and gauze
small scissors
alcohol pads
tweezers
pocket flashlight
A few other things you might want to add to your first aid kit would be:
calamine lotion
hydrocortisone ointment
Benadryl
antibiotic ointment
epinephrine
and of course some wire cutters.
Wire cutters? Well take a look and you’ll see why I think a decent pair of wire cutters should be included in your first aid kit.
